Academic Anxiety

Well, just had the  first bout of academic-related anxiety of the term. One minute, I was innocently flossing my teeth. The next, my mouth went dry and my heart pounded. My mind whirred with dates and calculations, trying to reconcile all my out-of-town weekends and commitments with assignment due dates.

As per my exchange requirements, I’m taking five “papers” (classes), even though the usual workload here is four. Three of my five papers are significantly easier than their U of T counterparts would be, and I’ll be writing essentially the same essay for two of my classes (the key word here is essentially – I’m an honest scholar!). All of this to say – under ordinary circumstances, I’d probably be fine.

These aren’t ordinary circumstances.

I’m in New Zealand, after all. This is the time for weekend getaways – I’m spending one at a sheep farm, another travelling with choir. I have Easter in Oamaru: the Steampunk Capital of NZ (who knew, right?). There is so, so much to do just on the tourist-y side. And yes, any credits I earn here are pass/fail –  so long as I pass, the actual mark will never show on my transcript.

But I’ll know.  

Then there’s the writing, which is, at least, thoroughly enjoyable. I’ll be honest: I have not touched Hapax-the-Podcast since I left Canada. I’m making friends, I’m having fun… but I can’t listen to my actors just yet.  Anyway, even if I wanted to, I can’t do much with the audio until edits to the text are done. My main problem there is the paralyzing sense of, “But I can’t let it go! I could still fix this one last thing!” That’s just something I need to get over.

Oh, and those chapter outlines for my next project? Yeah. About those…

But it’s ok. It’s all ok. Every term, I look at the mountain of work and swear it can’t be climbed. And every term, I somehow manage.

NASA has contingency plans for the backup plans of Plan B.

NASA’s got nothing on me.

Posted on March 12, 2012, in Travel, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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