And My Heart Goes “Thump”

It’s been a busy week.

I’ve been reacquainting myself with my city, catching up with all the various pockets of people in my life, and working to get Hapax-the-Podcast ready for launch. Oh, and thinking about getting myself ready for Dragon*Con.

It’s funny – I spent so much energy focusing on coming home, I almost forgot that I have to leave again.

Now I’ve remembered. And now that I’ve settled into my usual routine, both the podcast and novel seem that much closer. The first, faint tendrils of nervousness are starting to send their feelers out.

When you’re in your living room, sharing a mic with your friends, actually releasing a podcast still seems like a fairly abstract concept. I spent a portion of this week getting in touch with some of the other podcasters out there, to ask if they’ll play the Hapax promo. All have said yes so far, which is hugely exciting. Seriously, I’ve been blushing for days. The sense of community among writers and podcasters is nothing short of amazing.

…but it drives the point home: this is real. I’m really doing this.

I’ve been listening to podcasts for a long time. I started with I Should Be Writing when I was sixteen or so – I remember when the tagline was “The podcast for wannabe fiction writers, by a wannabe fiction writer.” I remember the “Double Trouble” Amazon rush (08/08/08!). I’ve watched the voices of the podcast community establish their careers: going from a single show to multiple print novels. Because the podosphere was coming into its own just as I was really deciding that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life, it’s had a huge impact on my development as a writer.

That’s why podcasting Hapax seemed like the logical next step.

That’s why the concept of hearing my promo on shows I’ve listened to since high school makes my heart go thump-leap-stop.

That’s why half my brain can run through the checklist of things I need to do, emails I need to send, and things I need to double-and-triple-check…while the other half says, “Hang on – wait, we’re actually doing this?”

Cold feet? No. I’m thrilled, and excited, and ridiculously proud of my cast, and all the rest of it. These are just the  jitters that come with the realization that I’m not standing on the edge of the diving board anymore.

I’ve already jumped.

Posted on August 21, 2012, in Writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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